Scooters

This week my kids got a scooter. They are having a blast taking turns and riding around, learning a new skill that will not only bring them enjoyment but increase their gross motor abilities. (P.S. The heir enjoyed his scooter so much he assigned me to write about it). We'll soon have a second scooter so that they can play on their own, but for now they are having a lot of fun sharing.

Shopping for a scooter, however, was a different experience. Going to the Big Blue Store can sometimes introduce some worldliness into lives as we are surrounded by the Stuff our society depends us. We could have bought some really cool scooters, name brand ones that look really sharp, but did we really need that? We could have bought bikes and trikes, extra cool helmets with spikes sticking out of them, or ten thousand other cheap consumer goods we are tempted to buy.

In the world we've created for ourselves, we are often intent on possessing stuff just so others can see that we have it. We want the best and most of everything; unfortunately, in the scramble to possess the best of this and that, we often miss the values that will actually make us happier. Money, in the end, can buy a great many things in the world, but it can't buy the things we all need most. What we need to do is accept the simple gifts in our lives, learn to share, and enjoy learning some new skills.

These will not be the end to scooters, or bikes, or other toys, but I hope the attitude can stay. I hope my children will keep being pleased by the simple gifts in their lives, for it is the gifts that stretch and grow them that will be the longest lasting.

Renewals and Rebirths

Over the past five months, my family and I have had a great deal of change in our lives and routines.  I left for three months to attend training for a new day job, not knowing where in the country my new employer would assign me to work.  I received my assignment some weeks into my training, and we began the process of finding housing online.  After I completed my training, I returned to my family, we packed up our belongings, then drove across the country to our new state.  We lived in a hotel for over six weeks while purchasing a new home.  While in the hotel, we welcomed a new daughter into our family and I started my new job, which was significantly different than my old one.  We then closed on our house and moved in.

In short, in the past five months we went from a blue-collar family in a small apartment in a rural location to a white-collar family in a surprisingly huge house in a good-sized city.  New job, new child, new city, new state, new house, new socioeconomic status: change has occurred rapidly this summer.

This summer has taught me about the inevitability of change, and about how to interact with that change.  Many people say that change is constant, and in a way they are correct.  What they may infer may not be, but the underlying statement is true.

This is because of the nature of God's love for us.  Renewal, rebirth, resurrection; these are eternal truths.  God gives us the opportunity to remake ourselves, not just one time, two times, or seven times seventy times, but constantly.  We are invited to have fountains of living water spring up within us from God, that we might be healed and renewed.  Each trial we face, each blessing we receive, each twist and turn in our lives is an opportunity to receive of God's grace and follow His will.

But do we take these chances of rebirth and renewal seriously?  Do we see these opportunities in the correct light, or are we so put off by the change that we can't see the greater pattern behind it?

My family and I have understood the changes we have lived over the past summer as a rebirth, a way for the Lord to change us to become more as He would have us be.  Without the gospel's light, some might see only a meandering path in life's changes, not understanding that the twists and turns are actually switchbacks, and that there is a wondrous goal on the peak ahead.  

May we always look to God and accept the renewal in each change that He sends us.

The repetitive missionary: A brief study of 1 Nephi 7

What interests me about this chapter is how much missionary work plays into it, and how the actors return again and again to missionary work.

Remember that at the end of chapter 5, Lehi is prophesying about his family.  The sons are receiving revelation directly from the Lord about their eternal inheritances as well as how the Lord will more immediately bless them with a chosen land.  Immediately thereafter, the Lord gives them a commandment to go back down to Jerusalem.  That doesn't seem coincidental to me; to receive revelation is to receive a duty, so when the sons are blessed with the word of God concerning their future families, they must go out and seek wives.  

That process, however, is nothing more than missionary work.  The sons go to Ishmael and convert him, telling him of the word of God and inviting him and his family to join them in the wilderness.  They convert him, and as we'll later see, his wife and several of his children.  The family of Ishmael begins to follow the sons back into the wilderness.

Here, Laman and Lemuel begin to lose faith.  They had been in the wilderness before, and were now headed back.  They had returned to Jerusalem, not just once, but twice, and they could see that it would be the last time.  Previously, they could have just been on a camping trip.  Now, with no more inheritance, and women to wed, they have to realize that Lehi is serious about actually going to a far off place to build a life.  This will be the end of this life.

Nor is it obvious that they're heading for a better place.  The threat to Jerusalem seems remote, and they know they're headed for more work.  Do we do the same?  Do we receive the gospel with joy, and then when we get into the work of it unconsciously back out or block?  For Laman and Lemuel, they felt the need to rebel and refuse to go back to Lehi in the wilderness.  They wanted to go back to Jerusalem.

Enter more missionary work:  Nephi starts preaching to Laman and Lemuel.  Nephi tells them that Jerusalem will be destroyed, and reminds them of all they have seen and all they should believe.  Laman and Lemuel, however, aren't impressed.  They tie him up and left him for dead.  Nephi prays to have the cords burst; they are loosened.  Then some more missionary work:  Nephi said he "stood before my brethren, and I spake unto them again."

Personally, I might have wanted to save myself, but Nephi is trying, yet again, to save his brothers.  With the help of Ishmael's wife, and several of her children, Nephi convinces the brothers to repent.  They do, and Nephi forgives them.  They continue on their way, into the wilderness where they have lots of work to do.

When we hear in our hearts the call to Paradise, to Zion, to the Promised Land we each have in store for us, we must first travel through a wilderness.  We must repetitively preach, returning again and again and again in an effort to save others, not ourselves.

One day we will reach that holy place.  One day we will be in Zion.  I think we will find that the wilderness was part of it all along, and that the work we did gave us the strength to bear the glory of it all.  So let's work--heaven is at stake, heaven both in this life and the next.

Spiritual rigor: A brief study of 1 Nephi 6

This is a rather short chapter which Nephi uses to remind his readers of his priorities.  He tells us what purpose his record has, and what method he will use to do it.

The linchpin of this chapter is found in verse 5: "Wherefore, the things which are pleasing unto the world I do not write, but the things which are pleasing unto God and unto those who are not of the world."

What Nephi is doing is assuring spiritual rigor in his writing.  A scientist insures that his research is scientifically rigorous by reviewing relevant literature and experiments, by using the proper methods to study his topic, and by accounting for and holding constant other variables not studied.  Similarly, Nephi is insuring that there is spiritual rigor in his writings by concentrating on the relevant spiritual context (the Plan of Salvation and Atonement of Jesus Christ), by using the proper methods to study his topic (faith, charity, hope, etc.), and by accounting for and holding constant other variables (by understanding and mitigating the point of view of the world).

Let's use a different analogy.  Carpenters use a variety of tools in their trade: hammers, screwdrivers, planers, etc., each designed to accomplish a different objective.  Carpenters with few tools aren't as useful as those with more.  More dangerously, to the carpenter with only a hammer, everything starts to look like a nail.

If we concentrate on thinking like the world does, we start limiting our spiritual perspective.  We start thinking that the world is full of nails, and can't understand what the Lord's people are saying when they start talking about screws.  Turn a nail with a hammer?  How?  That's completely foolish!

However, if we broaden our perspective to include the eternal, we find that the prophecies, teachings, sermons, and commandments we once found foolish become anything but.  With the proper context, we better understand what is happening to us, and what we must do.

That's why Nephi is making his record more than just a chronicle of the rulers of his people.  This isn't a history book; that's not what we need.  Most of all, we need a book that will "persuade men to come unto the God of Abraham..."  By concentrating on the things of God, Nephi's record (and the larger Book of Mormon) won't be acclaimed by scientists or historians. But it will contain spiritual rigor, and that's the sort of rigor we need most.

Natural and Godly Parenting: A Brief Study of 1 Nephi 5

In the first verses of this chapter, we see excellent examples of both natural and godly parenting.  Sariah, discouraged by her sons' absence and lacking a testimony of her husband's calling, complained to Lehi in a way that sounds very similar to how Laman and Lemuel had complained to Nephi:

• You're a visionary man, Lehi (read this as: I didn't see the vision, you did).  
• We don't have our inheritance anymore.
• My sons are no more.
• We will die here.

This are all completely natural worries and concerns.  Stuck in the middle of the wilderness, having forsaken their fortune for mere supplies, and with their strong and able sons gone, anyone can be excused for being fatalistic.  It wouldn't be very smart to be optimistic at this point.

In other words, Sariah is acting like the wonderful wife and mother she is.  She is concerned about her family's safety and security, she worries about her family's place in the world, and she is engaged with each member of her family and hasn't written anyone off.  She has also stayed with Lehi even when he (seemingly) comes up with a harebrained scheme to leave comfort for the wilderness.  

All this is very natural, and without a full and complete testimony (which she doesn't gain until verse 8) it's remarkable that she's apparently been (mostly) patient until now.  Only after the sons leave for the brass plates do the scriptures record that she begins to complain, and those complaints arise from a natural, motherly concern for her sons and her family.

However, even though those complaints are natural and motherly, they are still complaints, and relatively faithless complaints at that.  She doesn't trust that the Lord has guided their steps, and doesn't believe that He will save them and deliver them to the promised land.  

Lehi's response is meek, but effective.  He reminds Sariah of the context she has overlooked: that his visions allowed them to escape a Jerusalem that was bent on killing them, that God has promised them a land of promise greater than any inheritance they had, and that since their family was on the errand of the Lord, He would not permit them to die.  Sariah was comforted.

The sons return and here we see the truly godly parenting come into play.  First and foremost, Lehi makes sacrifice unto the Lord, Even before he read the scriptures he had just received, even with finite herds and supplies, Lehi sacrifices.  Then he reads the plates of brass from the beginning, discovering many things of "great worth" on them.

Lehi's example is clear.  He is heaven-bent on acquiring what is of most worth for his family.  Are the treasures they abandoned in Jerusalem good?  Sure, they could have provided the family with some measure of comfort and security, but only temporarily.  The greatest inheritance was found in looking beyond the temporary, remembering the eternal context of their lives, and acting in accordance to the commandments of a loving God, no matter how hard.

That is what our true Parents do, and how we should emulate them.  By doing the hard, necessary things we build for our families a far greater life than mere comfort ever could.  

Study of 1 Nephi 4: The Importance of Context

con·text

ˈkäntekst/ 

noun

1. the circumstances that form the setting for an event, statement, or idea, and in terms of which it can be fully understood and assessed

When the Lord asks us to do something, He does so within a certain context, a reality that we can't undermine or change.  Because the world around us is so full of false ideas, we might not see that context as fully as we should: good appears to be evil, and evil appears to be good.  What is wisdom to God is foolishness to man.  

In multiple places, this chapter emphasizes the importance of understanding the context of our decisions.  In other words, we should make our decisions based on reality as the Lord has made it, and not on the unsustainable values of the world in which we live .

First, Nephi reminds his despairing brothers that although Laban is powerful among men, God is far more powerful.  He reminds them that they have seen an angel, and that they are in the Lord's service (by the way, since when do inherently wicked men see angels?).  In such a context, it's a no-brainer that they should continue to seek the plates.  The vampiric hold that the world has on Laman and Lemuel makes them murmur, but they comply (or, at least, they don't get in the way anymore).  

Second, Nephi is constrained by the Spirit to kill Laban.  What convinces him to do so was a full understanding of the context of that commandment.  Not only did the Lord give Nephi a very fortuitous opportunity and the very sword with which to kill Laban, but He explained in detail why Laban needed to die.  Laban was a danger to Nephi's family, as they could quite easily have made a stink about Laban's theft.  That's not the context the Lord explained to Nephi.  Instead, the Lord spoke of generations hundreds of years hence, a reality that Nephi could not know.  

Third, when Zoram learns that he actually been following around Nephi, he naturally starts to fear for his life and tries to flee.  In his mind, he's just been hoodwinked by an impostor who might not want him to live to tell the tale.  

Nephi didn't want Zoram running away to warn the others, but instead of disposing of Zoram (or even of telling Zoram to leave him after he collected the brass plates) Nephi explained to Zoram the full import of what was going on.  After hearing of the Lord's commandment, Zoram took courage and agreed to go with the brothers. 

What these examples prove is that the Lord's commandments should never be read in the context the world tries to sell us.  The world would have convinced Laman and Lemuel to give us seeking the plates (it nearly did).  The Lord reminded them that His power is above all, and they successfully sought the plates.  The world would have had Nephi refrain from killing Laban, or to have Nephi kill him the wrong way so that he couldn't get the plates.  The Lord informed Nephi of the need of generations to come, a reality the world cannot clearly anticipate.  The world would have told Zoram to be quiet, appear to acquiesce to the brothers' demands, then run away from them whenever he could.  The Lord prepared Zoram to believe them, and instructed Zoram through the Spirit to accompany them.  

Simply put, because the world is so concentrated on the constant flow of immediate events and sensations, the world is in a poor position to make any long-lasting or important decisions.  All such decisions need the perspective the gospel provides, and the context of God's moderate reality.  

Inexplicably clean

Have you ever had one of those moments that take your breath away?  One second, you're pacing in the foyer with a squirrelly infant who's doing his best to distract you.  You feel the impatience rise in your gullet, and you know, intimately, how imperfect you really are.  Then a fellow member testifies,  It strikes a chord in your soul, and something changes.  You find yourself, in your mind, looking down at your hands.  They are wonderfully, inexplicably clean.

You didn't do anything to deserve that cleanliness.  You've tried, and failed, to be clean by yourself.  You've tried to be perfectly patient, loving, charitable, and honest.  You've tried to follow the commandments.  You'll continue trying.  And you'll continue failing.

And yet you're clean.  You've been made clean by Another, and that gives you a freedom that you never had before.

Remember, the Atonement isn't a check to cash at Judgement Day.  It's not an event, but a process.  If we want to use the Atonement, we can.  Right now. We can be wonderfully, inexplicably clean, if we but accept the conditions that the Atoner requires.

Those conditions don't require us to be perfect, but to rely on Him.  So have faith, and turn to Him now.  For if we don't turn to Him now, how will we turn to Him then?

He makes us clean, here and now.

Only one hour of church

Today we only had one hour of church #Mormonproblems.  A power outage left our building without electricity, Since there are no windows in the restrooms and the heating is tied to the electricity, the meetings after Sacrament meeting were canceled.  I was glad we had Sacrament meeting: not only did we get to partake of the Sacrament (the most important part of our worship service) but I always enjoy meeting with everyone and taking the time to hear what is said.

Not that that wasn't problematic, either.  Without the microphone, the speakers were quieter and my toddlers louder (in relation to the speaker) than usual.  Keeping them extra quiet was more than a little distracting.

Regardless, it was a good meeting where we were reminded to turn all of our will over to the Lord, and of the joy of a Christ-centered life.  Yet once we left I seemed to feel that our Sabbath was incomplete.  I think I've figured out why: I didn't really help anyone else.

Half of our worship is individual: when we prepare for and take the Sacrament, we are individually assessing our week and approaching our Lord to ask for forgiveness and renew covenants with Him.  When we sit down to learn from our classes, it is our individual preparation for the class and attention to the Spirit that dictate how much we learn.

Yet the other half of our worship is communal.  Our church is divided into wards (perhaps because that is where we go for healing).  Every presidency has counselors, every priesthood holder is a member of a quorum, Think of it: absolutely every single one of our callings and assignments in the Church have the sole purpose of serving other people.

So while one hour of church may seem like a reprieve, it isn't really.  I may not have to struggle through teaching another Gospel Principles lesson, or plunk out another hour of Singing Time.  Others may not have to endure my Gospel Principles lessons (it's the same thing, over and over again!) or be confused by the many mistakes in my piano playing.  But without the lessons, we can't serve others.  We can't support our teachers by preparing for the lessons and giving meaningful participation during the lesson.  We can't serve our brothers and sisters by sharing our talents (such as they are) and helping them learn to share theirs.    When we unite as a Church, we do more than just make God happy.  By both in giving and receiving, we bless and are blessed by others.  And that's worth a couple of hours in my book.

Study of 1 Nephi 3: The sin of Despair

Reading through this chapter, it struck me (rather uncomfortably) at how familiar some of Laman and Lemuel's behavior is.  It seems to me that they aren't out and out villains: rather, they're lukewarm Saints, whose failings may be very similar to some of our own.  Consider that in this chapter alone, Laman and Lemuel are both persuaded to go to the effort to go back to Jerusalem.  Laman went alone to Laban to ask for the plates.  Furthermore, both Laman and Lemuel are persuaded to trade everything they own for the plates.  Had that one transaction been successful, they would have still been impoverished.

Think about that for a moment.  Laman and Lemuel were consciously cutting off their last ties with Jerusalem.  They didn't have their father there, they had already tried to get the plates.  By attempting to purchase the plates with the family fortune, they were literally giving what they thought was their all to the work.  It was a hard thing they had been commanded to do (Lehi didn't object to that part) and they were willing to trade treasures and riches in order to do it.  What caused them to backslide?  What caused them to betray the angelic visitation they had seen?

In a word, despair.  The medieval theologians referred to one of the deadly sins as "ascedia," something that is sometimes translated as sloth, but can also be translated as despair.  This spiritual malady is derived from a lack or misplacement of faith.  When Laman returned empty handed from his first attempt, all of the brothers, Nephi included, were "exceedingly sorrowful."   For Nephi, that failure didn't affect his motivation.  For Laman and Lemuel, it made them want to return to their family camped in the desert.  Note that they didn't try to resume their lives in Jerusalem.

Nephi, however, convinced his older brothers to trade all of their gold and valuables for this one set of the scriptures.  They agreed, and helped haul all of the stuff to Laban's.  They had to know that if Laban had agreed to the deal, that they would never again be able to live in Jerusalem.

Laban, of course, reneged on the deal and stole all of their treasures, perhaps teaching Nephi and his brothers (if they were wise) to not trust in treasure and mammon to do the Lord's work.  The brothers fled, and hid in a cave.

What happened next is a very human and natural failing: Laban and Lemuel despaired.  They were without their treasure (that was going to happen anyway) but now they had nothing to show for it.  They assumed that because things didn't appear to be going their way, that the Lord wasn't going to be with them.  They were faithless in the face of adversity, willing perhaps to give their "all" in the light of day and when things made sense.  Real faith, however, is willing to give our all in the dark of night and when things don't make a lot of sense.

In reality, Laban's sudden windfall caused him to celebrate, and drove him into the drunken stupor that killed him.  Those treasures caused his downfall (lesson, anyone?), though Laman and Lemuel couldn't see that.

How often do we despair?  How often is our faith tied to our perceived success?  We can't see all of the Lord's handiwork; how often does our effort seem to depend on how much we see the Lord do?

Laman and Lemuel had cold-blooded faith.  When things were warm and favorable (like hearing a powerful sermon, for example) they could be convinced to follow the Lord.  When things went badly, they spiraled down into selfishness and faithlessness.  Let us remain warm-blooded, and have our testimonies kindle our success, rather than the other way around.

Gloria!

Today's a rainy day.  I'm tempted to think that it's gloomy, and that I'd rather just waste my time on Facebook reading (very) mildly entertaining articles.  Also, that I'm hungry and have run out of ideas for this blog.

But then I thought about each raindrop that is falling from the sky.  Each drop is a collection of water molecules that have likely circled the globe (or at least a wide swath of North America and the Atlantic).  Each drop can nourish plant life or us; each drop, if frozen, can dazzle with beauty and symmetry.  Each drop is a gift from God.

He makes the rain fall so that the environment which surrounds us is the most conducive one for the benefit for our souls.  He is giving me now hundreds of thousands of tiny gift-wrapped parcels of H20 in order to create and maintain this physical space which, in turn, allows me to become a better person.

Each drop is wisely placed, in both time and location.  Each drop is carefully measured, and given with the most profound care.

So also for everything else.  The air we breathe, the food we eat, even the electrical impulses which course through our synapses, are all gifts from above.  Our luxuries, our trials, our leisure, our work; all come from Him.

Even our own efforts are marbled with His gifts.  I can type a blog post, but how much of that is really mine?  God gave me the Internet, this laptop, fingers, a working nervous system, a rudimentary amount of intelligence, the training to become literate, and a little bit of experience in writing.  He also gave me a commandment to keep the Sabbath day holy, and time on that Sabbath to think and to write.  Really, what do I own of this?

The only things that AREN'T a gift, the only things that we can claim as purely our own are our own choices.  And that agency, that ability to choose our path, was also once a gift.

So let's choose wisely.  Let's look for the beauty and the blessings of a gloomy afternoon.  Let's see what God would have us see rather than be content with the inane ramblings of Babble-on.  Most of all, let's praise God, not just in word and in song, but in our hearts.  Because he's giving us hundreds of thousands of presents right now, even if it doesn't seem like it.

But I'm angry!!!

Yesterday evening I had the...pleasure...of working with an inmate who was being disruptive.  He had been promised the opportunity to work, but circumstances made it such that he couldn't.  He was told he wouldn't be able to, but that he could work the next day.

The inmate got angry.  More angry, in fact, than any rational person ever needs to be.  When the chips settled, he was in paper clothing, sitting on a concrete bunk, with hard restraints on his hands, feet, and around his waist.  I accompanied the lieutenant as he spoke with the inmate, trying to convince the inmate to just settle down so they could take off the restraints.

What the inmate said was troubling and may reflect some of the opinions we hold here on the outside.  Over and over again, the inmate repeated, "I was angry," as if that explained and even excused his aggression against staff and other inmates.  It seemed to me that the inmate believed that he had been required to act on his anger by engaging in highly disruptive behavior.

Do we believe that our emotions require action?  The vast majority of us won't end up in prison, nor will we do the things inmates do.  But do we also do self-destructive things simply because we are angry, confused, lonely, or upset?  Do we allow hunger, thirst, lust, fear, or even boredom to dictate our actions?

I believe that the main purpose of mortality is the have us learn to experience, and to master, these impulses.  They are given to us by God, so they are important, and we have much to learn from them.  But we must learn from them, and not be directed by them.  Instead, we are directed by reason and by faith.

When our Lord and Savior was on the earth, he lived a normal life perfectly.  It was filled with fear, hunger, thirst, and even despair ("My god, my god, why hast thou forsaken me?")  He felt all things we feel, and yet He had the goodness to do the right regardless of what mortal impulses were yelling at him to do.

He is our Exemplar.  When we have a trial we do not want to face, a hunger that must be sated NOW, regardless of consequences, when we are tired and don't want to bother with the next difficult thing the Lord would have us do, we should remember His example.  His willingness to master Himself saved us all, and now He gives us the chance to do so ourselves.